Avatar

"Just relax and let your mind go blank. That shouldn't be too hard for you." -Grace

James Cameron's Avatar is about crippled, ex-Marine Jake Sully (Sam Worthington) who goes to the alien planet of Pandora, which is being ruthlessly mined by a corporation. Sully has volunteered to take his twin brother's place after he dies and must now go amongst the natives (who are living on top of the biggest mineral deposit) in his alien "avatar" to study them and find their weaknesses. However, the more time he spends with the natives the more he comes to respect them and the more torn he becomes between the peaceful, diplomatic Dr. Grace Augustine (Sigourney Weaver) and the war-mongering Colonel Miles Quaritch (Stephen Lang). And when war becomes inevitable, which side will he choose?

I'll just preface this whole thing with two facts: this is James Cameron's first film in over ten years and it cost over $250 million to make. These two facts can explain why I went to see this movie at all because it had nothing to do with the trailer. I will also say that the visuals were spectacular. Live action and animation blended seamlessly and presented the image of a beautiful and inventive alien world. And even though it was 2 1/2 hours, I was never bored. However, this is not a great movie. This is an enjoyable movie that I have now seen once but that I will never go out of my way to see again. And the reason is two words: character development. It's a novel thing that some people put in their scripts, James Cameron. I suggest you try it sometime. In fact, it was while watching this movie that I finally realized why I never liked Titanic. Rose's fiancee is unrealistically selfish and cruel and Rose and Jack are too wonderful. Same for Avatar. All the characters except for Jake are flatter than paper dolls with no complexity and little to no character motivations. Quaritch is evil because he is a Marine officer, therefore he MUST want to completely wipe out indigenous peoples and laugh about it later. Grace is the tough but fair scientist who wants to study the indigenous people, therefore she MUST sympathize wholeheartedly and unreservedly with the natives. Neytiri (Zoe Saldana) is a native princess, therefore she MUST be one with nature and commune with Mother Willow the Tree of Souls. Parker Selfridge (Giovanni Ribisi) is a businessman, therefore he MUST be a soulless corporate tool. Beautiful, James Cameron. How long did it take you to come up with these characters? As for the protagonist, Jake Sully, his "transformation" is about as stereotypical as you can get. Slightly disillusioned military man realizes the "savages" he has been sent to kill are actually wise, noble people and their nature worship is far better than our crazy civilized ideas. BORING!

On top of that, this movie is so green, it recycles the plot. Man of European descent comes to a strange place with strange people and realizes that the very thing he has been searching for is amongst the very people he was sent to fight. Also, he should fall in love with one of the natives, preferably the chief's daughter, thus making a rival out of the chief warrior.

Studio Exec: Hey, James Cameron, do you think we should change it up at all? Maybe add some unexpected twist or unique character?
James Cameron: No, if it worked for Pocahontas and Dances with Wolves, it will work for us!
Studio Exec: But do you think people will notice that we ripped off a bunch of other movies?
James Cameron: I already set it on an alien planet which I've cleverly named Pandora! What more do you want?
Studio Exec: Touche.

Ignoring the blatant rip-offs, let's examine the plot itself. I'm sick of movies about the "noble savage" and this movie doesn't redeem them in my eyes. I suppose this goes along with characters but can someone please explain why the natives are all perfect while we're all corrupt!? Note to Rousseau, those "noble savages" become us. Which means that the corrupt people in our society are in their's too! They are not perfect! We are not horrible! Once again, flat and stereotypical. The rest of the plot had several amusing plot holes which include Quaritch's ability to identify individual natives, the fact that Jake must be chosen by a banshee but can use any old "Last Shadow," and the fact that Jake's twin in never mentioned again after the first 15 minutes.

As I am quickly running out of time and space, I would like to add a couple final points. The acting, especially the voice performance by Zoe Saldana, were amazing and at times, completely heart-wrenching. Also, James Cameron is a master of emotional manipulation which is how he gets away with as much as he does. I recommend it for a one time viewing specifically for the graphics, but if you keep the above quote in mind, you'll enjoy the whole thing! 3 stars.

P.S.-Listen for the credit song and think fondly back to Titanic...

Baker's Dozen

Twelve days of my favorite Christmas movies (in no particular order) plus one which I just kind of think is funny:

1. The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993): In which Jack Skellington learns the true meaning of Christmas Halloween Christmas(?). Is it for Christmas? Is it for Halloween? Nobody knows but the Oogie Boogie Man has a song and dance number!
   
2. The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992): In which Michael Caine learns the joy of acting with inanimate objects. My most favoritist version of A Christmas Carol that I watch every year without fail. Minus that one song about the love being gone... No dice, Mr. Goodman.
   
3. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005): In which Robert Downey Jr learns the benefits of a botched robbery. Even if it's not about Christmas spirit, this noir-influenced comedy set during the holiday season makes me all warm and fuzzy inside anyway. Nothing like watching RDJ and Val Kilmer banter about the proper use of bad and badly to put you in a holiday mood!
   
4. Joyeux Noel (2005): In which the German, French, and Scottish armies learn the joy of soccer. Based on a true story, the armies call a truce on Christmas Eve to bury their dead, have a prayer service, and play a game of soccer before continuing the war. A truly moving film that perfectly embodies Christmas without beating you over the head with a stick.
   
5. Brazil (1985): In which the audience learns the meaning of weird. Terry Gilliam’s masterwork tells the futuristic holiday tale of materialism and bureaucracy gone horribly wrong. Upon first viewing, you’ll probably wonder what the hell just happened, but that just means you should watch it again!
   
6. A Santa Clause (1994): In which Tim Allen learns the inner workings of the North Pole. I don’t care what anyone says, I liked it then and I like it now. No other movie has made hot chocolate look quite so good or David Krumholtz so cute. But I do believe that I’ll pass on the sequels.
   
7. Edward Scissorhands (1990): In which Johnny Depp and Tim Burton learn the joy of each other. Everyone knows the tale of tragic Edward Scissorhands and though it may be a bit of a downer, I bet after watching it you’ll want to invite that weird guy who always muttering to himself and can never figure out the printer over for Christmas dinner. Huh, huh? Well, then maybe just just try saying hi to him? Every other Friday?
   
8. It's a Wonderful Life (1946): In which Jimmy Stewart learns to never trust handicapped people. An all-time Christmas (and Frank Capra) favorite. No one's year is complete without hearing, "Every time a bell rings, an angel get it's wings," at least once.
   
9. The Shop Around the Corner (1940): In which Jimmy Stewart learns the joys of having a pen pal. Also starring Stewart, this Christmas movie is much more about stubbornness and love than Santa but it's still a winter charmer!
   
10. Tokyo Godfathers (2003): In which Americans learn that Japan celebrates Christmas. The story of three homeless social misfits who find a baby on Christmas Eve, it's an unusual but brilliant Christmas anime.
    
11. Die Hard (1988): In which John McClane learns that people with German accents are evil (and probably terrorists). Bruce Willis kicks ass when the company Christmas party is attacked by evil TERRORISTS (played by the lovable Alan Rickman). Who could ask for anything more?
    
12. Love Actually (2003): In which Hugh Grant learns that the only thing easier than being a CEO is being the British Prime Minister. This tells the story of several couples finding love at Christmas, when life is wonderful and little children dress up as lobsters and sing Mariah Carey covers. My favorite is Billy Mack! ...this also has Alan Rickman...
    

PLUS:

1. Eyes Wide Shut (1999): In which Stanley Kubrick spits in the face of everyone who likes Christmas. Here is a film that is long, explicit, and depressing and has nothing to do with the holiday season other than to mock the human sentiment that goes along with it. Here's to you, Stan!

Post your Christmas Favorites! I know someone's just dying to say Elf.

Side Note

Next time you see a date montage in a movie, turn that delightful little song off and watch it again. Chances are this will now be the most boring sequence in the movie and some poor, poor editor had a hell of a time turning some completely meaningless shots of a frolicking couple into two people finding true love. Thank goodness for the miracle of pop songs.